I thought I’d fill in the gaps for you with the rest of the trip to LA to see Airborne Toxic Event. Pretty exciting stuff, people! It has trains, food AND lipstick involved! Very exciting stuff.

It all started out at the train station. I of course was paranoid there was going to be an overturned semi on the freeway to prevent me from getting from my work to the train station in time, so I left about a half hour too early.


And Amtrak was about a half hour late. That’s me waiting there for the train. There was a girl standing next to me that insisted we were on the same train, even though they were scheduled to leave at completely different times, had different train numbers, and were a different train company. So when her train changed to the next platform over, she tried to literally pull me over there with her. I’m on a different train lady, leave me alone!!

Here’s what’s great about the train. You get on it, you connect to their free wifi, stick headphones in your ear so you can listen to Spotify, take out your ipad so you can Pinterest and write stuff, and you drink the free wine whilst gazing out into the beautiful Pacific Ocean. Here I’m trying to show you just that. Look guys, I’m drinking wine out of the bottle and Pinteresting at the same time because I’m classy! Are you buying it?



I couldn’t manage to get a non-blurry picture of my ipad, wine and view. Besides, they all looked stupid because I’m just holding them up. I was trying to contort myself into a position that looked classy yet comfortable so you’d think I didn’t set up the shot, but I’m just naturally that cool. I’m so not good at this.

In other news, look how green the water is! Keep in mind, this is from the train which has a filthy window full of sea air stuck on it to muck things up. But the water is indeed green. In San Clemente. Who knew?!

After this (and the wine) I proceeded to take about 75 selfies of me gazing out of the train, trying to make it look like someone across from me was taking the picture. I shall not bore you with those. They’re pretty hideous. You think anyone saw me do it? Gosh, I hope not.

union station

And now I’m at Union Station! Fabulous. This night was the concert, so I already filled you in on that. Remember when I told you that I was obnoxious with my order and asked they build my usual breakfast for me? Well, here it is. In the flesh, people.

the standard dtla
the standard dtla
the standard dtla
the standard dtlathe standard dtla

Except they didn’t put the avocado between the bread and the eggs. They must’ve seen right through me trying to be rich and famous in LA, and realized I’m just a normal bozo who doesn’t know how to demand things. This was at The Standard Hotel in Downtown LA. Really great, right? The food was super good, those potatoes were goooood! I wanted to sit outside, but it was suddenly fall, so I was down for inside with constant coffee refills.

Later on that day we ventured out to Hollywood for the TMZ Bus Tour. I do not follow the celebrities, but my friend does, so we hopped on the bus and hoped to find us some famous people! We didn’t, but it was still fun. You can literally see a line in the grass where Beverly Hills ends (green) and LA starts (brown). The other half, am I right?

I decided this would be a great time for me to find the perfect red lipstick. I walk into a practically empty MAC store (unheard of) and I pretend to look at makeup until someone comes up to help me. Which was only two seconds, which is great. So this guy in all black (as they do) sits me down in a chair and grabs their most popular lipstick. A44. I forget what it’s called but that’s the number. As he’s cleaning the lipstick before putting it on me, I try telling him I’m new to this whole red lipstick thing, but I think I need to get into it because it’s awesome. He proceeds to line my lips, fill them in with liner, then puts lipstick on top of that. You guys, I felt like a pale drag queen. Do I look like a pale drag queen?

red lipstick

I almost didn’t show you, because…well, because. But you’ve been with me on this red lipstick journey, so I feel I owe it to you. Please note my lip is NOT that crooked, he lined that side funny. Again…drag. The liner was out of control. Had a mind of its own. I told him maybe I need something a bit calmer, to ease me into the red lip, so I tried on four more lipsticks, and by that time my lips were stained and peeling from wiping so much lipstick and liner off. He looked at me with his hand on his hip and said “maybe if we put some…” then waved his hand up at my face “…bronzer or blush or something on you.” Okay, I get it! I’m pale! I don’t wear a lot of makeup! I probably should never have stepped foot into a MAC store! What was I thinking. I laughed (because lets face it, he’s totally right) then said I’ll walk around with this last color on my lips and see how it makes me feel (please see the shopping rules), and go from there. Then I took a picture for you.

MAC downtown la

The middle one is A44, and it actually looked best on me despite myself. I think maybe I’m just not ready for red lipstick? Love/hate relationship, people.

I said goodbye to DTLA and my mini-vaca, and took the metro back to Union Station for my train ride back free happy hour. Riding the metro is fun, because it reminds me of the subway in NYC and I miss the city so much it hurts.

primos dtla


Then, for a very exciting turn of events, the too-small boots I ordered online (what is wrong with me?) were waiting for me at my house and get this…THEY FIT!

chinese laundry boots

This is why I’m not a fashion blogger, folks. All the pictures would look like this. But those boots are pretty rad and I want to wear them every day of my life.


1 Comment on DTLA

  1. Coryn
    November 10, 2014 at 8:33 am (2 years ago)

    Love the boots!

    Ps: nice ass.


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